Show, Don’t Tell

Ryan Thomas

Materials:

Students will need their writing workshop notebook and will need to take notes in the designated “Writing Craft” section.

Time:

Approximately 20 minutes

Objectives:

NCTE Standards

· Students adjust their use of spoken, written, and visual language (e.g., conventions, style, vocabulary) to communicate effectively with a variety of audiences and for different purposes.

NCSCS Standards

· Competency Goal 1: The learner will use language to express individual perspectives drawn from personal or related experience.

1.01: Narrate a fictional or autobiographical account which:

§ uses remembered feelings and specific details.

Purpose of Mini-Lesson:

The purpose of this mini-lesson is to make young adolescent writers aware that they can engage the reader more by using descriptive words that show what they are trying to tell rather then simply telling in their writing. This lesson should be taught when the teacher begins writing workshop with the class. It can also be used to aid when students are having trouble with being descriptive in their writing. Hopefully, by the end of the lesson, students will recognize that they are more engaged when reading passages that are descriptive and have ideas about how to improve their writing to make it descriptive.

Activity:

The teacher will give students two very short (1-2 pgs) reading passages to read to themselves. The passages should have been chosen so that one is very descriptive with great details, and the other somewhat boring with little description. The students will then be asked to discuss with the teacher which passage they liked best and why. The students should answer that they like the more descriptive passage. The teacher will ask them to pick out particular words that jumped out at them and the teacher will write them on the board for students to record in their notebook. The students and teacher will then make a general list of descriptive words on the board that the students can use for a quick reference when writing. Once the lesson is over, students should have a list of words that they can use in their own writing, and have an understanding that writing is more effective when it is descriptive.

Script:

I am really excited about writing workshop and have some good ideas about how to make your writing even better than it already is. If you would please take out your writing workshop notebook and turn to the “Writing Craft” section. (Give students time to get notebooks)

(Distribute reading passages to the class.) I have given you guys two passages to read to yourselves. Please read carefully because we are going to be using the passages in a moment. (Give students time to read)

Okay, which passage did you like best? (Give students a chance to answer. Students should have picked the more descriptive passage.)

Why did you pick the passage you picked? (Give students a chance to answer. Students should say, I could see what the author was saying, I was more interested, etc.)

The reason that you probably like the [name of passage] is because it shows you more than it tells you. Readers are typically more interested in what the writer has to say when the writer uses descriptive words that keep the reader’s attention. What are some descriptive words that you see in this passage? Please write these words down in your notes as I write them on the board. (Record on overhead or chalkboard the words that the students are picking out. If there are words left out, add to the list.)

Now we have words that show what you are trying to say and I want you to use those words in your own writing. Let’s continue our list beyond the passage. What are some descriptive words that you think everyone might be able to use? (List should include colors, sounds, shapes, sizes, etc. Add to list if necessary.)

Follow Up:

Make individual suggestions to students writing on how they can make their writing more descriptive.

Related Lesson:

*Using adjectives in writing